Top Ten Likely Events At Goliath and Elisa's Wedding (Hey, we can dream, can't we?)

by Todd Jensen

10. Travis Marshall, covering the wedding, describes this as the first "gargoyle/human marriage". Macbeth says, "Well, not the first, laddie."

9. Bronx is given a bath by the trio before attending the wedding, and shows very clearly a longing to go roll in the dirt for a good long while as soon as it's over.

8. Vinnie shows up uninvited, and tries to load the wedding cake in "Mr. Carter" for fresh ammunition against the groom.

7. The trio giving a rousing chorus of "Sunrise, Sunset."

6. Broadway scoops up all the rice thrown about for a snack later on.

5. Demona gatecrashes the ceremony with her lawyer and a breach-of-promise suit.

4. All the food on the buffet table mysteriously vanishes, and Broadway looks distinctly uncomfortable when questioned about it.

3. Bronx disrupts the proceedings by chasing Cagney through the hall.

2. Bronx starts howling during the organ music; when the minister tells the trio to quiet their dog, Brooklyn replies, "What for? The organist started it."

And the No. 1 Likely Event at Goliath and Elisa's Wedding is....

1. Goliath flying off with Elisa in his arms for the honeymoon, a "Just Married" sign tied to his tail.