compiled from the Station 8 Gargoyles Comment Room.
(with apologies to Jeff Foxworthy and rednecks everywhere)
You might be a gargoyle if...
...you think you're being stalked by the full moon.
…you can chop vegetables with your toenails.
…your clothes take longer to decay than plutonium.
…you run around Manhattan wearing a loincloth, and people actually NOTICE.
…your skin is a shade usually reserved for crayons.
…you never need to wear sunblock.
…in a typical night, you meet an allegedly dead king, talk to a watery tart, and get beaten up
by another allegedly dead king, before chasing a dragon around Brooklyn.
- Bud-Clare
…your only names were "Friend," "Brother," "Sister," or "HEY YOU!!"
…your dog can climb trees.
…your idea of "picking up a chick" is catching her while she's falling from a building.
…you can defy human laws of physics.
- Blaise
...you never need to do laundry or take a bath.
...you end a date by saying "Goodnight, sis."
- Patrick Toman